The Importance of Consistency and Alignment
What would you do if you were learning to drive and you came to an intersection with a stop sign and a green signal? Would you be confused? Would you wonder what was happening? Would you go? Stop? Find another route?
Put yourself in your toddler’s shoes. Everything is new to them and they are trying to figure out how everything works.
And they heavily rely on their parents and caregivers for support and guidance.
How do you think they feel if one parent says one thing and the other parent contradicts? They may feel like they are at an intersection with a green light and the stop sign.
And then they need to test to see what happens. Every. Single. Time.
If you go to a vending machine and hit a button without putting money in it and get a free drink, would you not want to try your luck every time you go to a vending machine?
This is why it is extremely important that all caregivers are consistent with each task/skill with children. With regards to eating, it means you are consistent in your approach to feeding your child, so they can confidently practice their eating skills. It also means you are aligned with what foods you find acceptable and what foods you prefer to eat occasionally. You don’t want your child to be confused and you don’t want them testing you, which inevitably will end up in a confrontation at some point or in some family’s over and over and over again.
If this is a concern for your family, drop me a note and let me know what you and your partner are not on the same page with. I’d love to know.